If you lived in my house and could tolerate the occasional fits, there is a live sitcom happening daily.  It stars a small girl named Ellie who has a remedy for everything.  Ant hills?  No problem… she’ll just go get her kazoo and take care of that.  Kazoos are just for getting bugs away.  Harmonicas are different.  Got eczema?  Baby powder, soap, rub, rinse, repeat.  She won’t eat new foods unless you can assure her that “no animals got deaded” and she picks & eats fruits and vegetables from the neighbor’s garden.  She drives me crazy, makes me laugh, and everyday I am so grateful for the opportunity to be her mama.

These are my Facebook status updates

from the last month…

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Me: “Hey, Ellie.  Let’s put your bathing suit on — we’re going to the lake.”

Ellie: “Oh, yes.  I love my green babing soup.  I always wanted to wear that today, but in the meantime I wore this dress.”

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Me: “Ellie, I think you’re tired. You were up too late & up too early.”
Ellie: “No, I’m not tired.”
Me: “We could read books & snuggle.”
Ellie: “I’m allergic to snuggling.”

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While enjoy my morning coffee, I could hear Ellie upstairs karate chopping things yelling, “Hi-ya!”. She just hollered down the stairs, “Mom, come quick! My clothes are attacking me.”

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Ellie: “Mom, why do the vultures like the United States?”

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Ellie playing with Ariel in the bathtub: “Can you help me? My friends have all gone to Mississippi.”

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Ellie: “Mom, will you get me some water for my plants?”
Me: “Yes, in a minute.”
{2 min later} Ellie: “Get me some water, dammit!”
Me: “Hey! That’s a bad word. Where did you learn that?”
Ellie: “Caillou.”

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Ellie: “Mom, I’m wearing makeup. Do you think I look beautiful?”
Me: “You’re always beautiful. You don’t need makeup, just a big heart & a smile.”
Ellie: “Yes, and lipstick.”

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Ellie: “Mom, did you know that I facebooked Curious George?”

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Recently, we spent a week at my parents house in Pennsylvania.  There are so many people & family that we try to see when we go “home”.  On our last evening there, my Godmother & her daughter {who was also a bridesmaid in my wedding} came up to see us.  Within moments, Ellie had climbed onto Amanda’s lap and was going through a small brag book of photos.  Soon she came across a picture of her Daddy and I at the Magic Kingdom standing in front of the castle.

Ellie: “This is a picture of me at Disney World.”

Amanda: “Okay.”

Ellie: “I’m just still in my Mom’s belly… drinking milk from her boobs.”

Amanda: “Oh, really?”

Ellie: “Yes, that’s how they do it.”

When we made the commitment to change our diet at home, I knew that getting a three-year-old on board was going to take some time.  One of her favorite parts about trips to Target was the stop at the lunch counter for chicken nuggets & a cheese stick — both clearly off the menu at home.  While she no longer asks for these items anymore, at first the conversation went like this:

Ellie: “Mom, I want chicken nuggets.”

Me: “No, not today.”

Ellie: “Mom, I *really* want chicken nuggets.  I’m really hungry.”

Me: “Ellie, we’re not eating chicken anymore.  You don’t want to eat a chicken do you?”

Ellie: “MOM, I just want to eat a dead animal!!”  

Our friend Myra.

The first few weeks of the menu change didn’t go so well, but as soon as the shakes subsided, something else subsided, too:  her eczema.   And after spending time with our chicken friend, Myra, she had a light bulb moment and has decided not to eat chicken for fear of “making Myra sad.”

I never thought I’d raise a vegan kid, but it turns out that almond milk is pretty tasty and black beans can replace egg & oil in our brownies.  Occasionally, she’ll still say things that make my jaw drop.  Out to eat one evening, when she spotted the claw game full of live lobsters, she asked me for some money.

Me: “What do you want money for?”

Ellie: “I want to catch one of those lobsters.”

Me: “What are you going to do with it?”

Ellie: “I’m gonna dead it and EAT it for dinner!”

She can, at times, be both violent AND expensive.

You might imagine that most children would be reluctant to eat vegetables, fruits, beans, and grains all day, but we’re talking about Ellie.  Ellie, who begs for the veggie tray at the store, eats frozen peas, and steals apples mid-bite.

Eating edamame as a baby.

We are really blessed to have such a good eater!

If you lived in my neighborhood, you might notice that I am often outside in the morning chasing small creatures down the sidewalk in my pajamas with mascara around my kneecaps.  I am the neighborhood lunatic.

Sunday morning was certainly no exception as Toby led the charge outside our yard, up the walking trail, and down the street.  The puppy followed.  Realizing that no amount of treats would change their mind, I took off running in my pajama pants & flip flops praying that one, my sweater would stay closed and two, that my neighbors were all still in bed.

I was able to capture the puppy first, but when I turned around I knew I was in trouble.  At the top of the hill stood the chief of police walking her German Shepherd.  Shit.  Shit.  Shit.

“Toby, please come here,” I pleaded.  It was too late — my Maltese was staring down the chief of police & barking at a K9 that could swallow him whole.

“Toby, come!” I hollered.  No luck.  Toby was bouncing back & forth at the German Shepherd.

I could feel the heat of the situation in my face…  THIS. IS. SO. EMBARRASSING.

“GO HOME, TOBY” yelled the chief of police in her bad cop voice.  ”YOU’RE A BAD DOG, TOBY!”  she continued, but Toby wasn’t believing it.  I, however, peed my pants.  Before Toby could become the middle layer of a s’mores, I was able to chase him back home.

Next Sunday, I will drink my coffee first.

Today is Thursday and I’m convinced that the Easter Bunny really should have delivered more jelly beans.

How is it possible that one small child could have consumed so much candy in a few days?

Turns out, she had help.  The problem with jelly beans is that they travel to the bottom of the basket and if you’re not careful, you may eat them all without noticing.  BUT, children always notice.  Their minds carefully inventory their stash in a glance.  Eat their candy, they’ll know, and baby…you will pay.

“My Dad is a stinker butt,” Ellie told her friend in the car today.  ”He ate ALL my jellybeans!”

“Yeah,” her friend responded, “my Dad is a stink bug, too.”

I am just as guilty although I had nothing to do with the disappearance of the beans.  I’m guilty because I already had a strategy in place.  To pilfer from your children, you must take a little at a time while convincing them that it was they, not their loving mother who gobbled up their candy.  Instead, he got to them first and that just burns me up.

Since Sunday morning my mouth has been watering for the taste of Juicy Pear Jelly Bellys.  I had grand plans to sneak into that basket after Ellie had gone to bed, but when the moment arrived… there was nothing left.

The question is not: “Should we buy more jelly beans?”.  

The real question is:  ”When I buy more jelly beans, should I let anyone else know about it?”

Hey there, Sports Fans.  I know you’re all big football fans, but let’s face it… we still have a few months before the next kick-off.  Until then, I’d like to draw your attention to an exciting contest on behalf of Discover & the NHL.

I’m from Pennsylvania — a state divided with Flyers fans in the East & Penguins fans in the West.  I grew up in the middle and since my mama is from Buffalo, there were also the Sabres to watch.  Those Buffalo fans…  baby, they are true fans.  My cousins lived for Sabres hockey.

SO, if you follow hockey, you may have heard that there’s this little ol’ trophy called the Stanley Cup and one lucky person is about to win a Day with the Cup.  Imagine the opportunity!  To have the Stanley Cup come knocking at your door.  Not just that, the winner will also win a trip for 2 to the Stanley Cup Final game including airfare & hotel accommodations AND a $250 Discover Giftcard.  Total prize value: $3,950.

So, how do you win it?

Submit a photo of you or your kiddo demonstrating your passion for the sport of hockey along with an essay describing why you deserve to win a Day with the Stanley Cup.  All eligible entries will be judged by representatives of the Sponsor and an independent judge to determine three (3) Finalists, based on the following criteria:

Originality and Creativity of Essay – 35%;

Enthusiasm as Demonstrated in Essay – 35%;

Appropriateness of Photo to Theme – 20%; and

Sincerity of Essay – 10%.

Love the rubric, don’t you?  After the three finalists are chosen, online voting will begin!  Between April 17-21, fans will be able to vote for their favorite submission using their Facebook account.  Fans can vote once per day in the contest.  Whoever receives the most votes wins the grand prize! 2nd place wins a $250 Discover giftcard & 3rd place wins a $100 giftcard.

But you don’t have to leave here empty handed.  I have two $25 Discover Giftcards to giveaway to two lucky readers.  Winners will be chosen at the end of the contest on April 21.  Here’s how YOU can win:

• Leave a comment telling me your favorite hockey team

- or -

• If you entered the contest, tell me quickly why you want to win a Day with the Cup!

Good luck!

Note: Day With the Cup™ is open to all legal residents of the 50 United States who are at least 18 years old. Legal guardians of children under the age of 18 are eligible to enter on behalf of their children. All eligible entries will be judged by representatives of the Sponsor and an independent judge to determine three Finalists based on the on the following criteria: originality and creativity of essay, enthusiasm as demonstrated in essay, appropriateness of photo to theme and sincerity of essay.

Disclosure: I was compensated for writing this post by the sponsor.  All opinions are my own.

Toby - the first member of our zoo.

It’s a zoo around here.

With two bunnies, a Maltese, a new Lab puppy, a three year old, and two nests of birds on our front porch, it’s getting a bit wild in this house.  The puppy, while adorable, has been terrorizing everyone.  Our days have been spent rescuing toys, cleaning floors, taking A LOT of walks, and attempting to teach a new dog some manners.

It was time for a treat — a movie night was in order.  After watching the trailer for We Bought a Zoo, we knew that it would be an enjoyable movie for the whole family.  Knowing that it was available at Walmart, we put all the critters in their enclosures & escaped our zoo for a little shopping excursion.

Before you shop, there are several money saving options available to you.  First, in some stores you will find a $4-off coupon for the purchase of the movie We Bought a Zoo on participating Del Monte pet products.  Unfortunately, we were not able to find one at our store.

Getting Ready for Movie Night!

Additionally, you’ll find Del Monte pet products being featured in several publications including Parade magazine & Women’s World magazine.  In First for Women magazine, you’ll find a $.50-off coupon for Del Monte fruit cups.

And fruit cups, my friends, are a handy little food to keep on hand — especially for movie night.  Normally, we would make a big bowl of popcorn but with temperatures in the 80′s in the South, a frozen treat {that the puppy can’t steal!} seemed like a great alternative.

Our newest addition to the family zoo.

Smoothie Time!

While we watched the preview, we gathered our ingredients — Del Monte “no sugar added” Diced Peaches & Raspberry Sorbet.  With no fat, sorbet is a healthier alternative to ice cream.

We scooped the sorbet into our smoothie maker, added one cup of diced peaches, & blended until smooth!  It’s so easy to make, that Ellie actually did it herself while the puppy supervised.

Finally, it was movie time!  Ellie’s favorite way to watch a movie is all snuggled up on the couch with her mama.  Unfortunately, we had several uninvited guests who were after our smoothies!!  It’s good we bought dog treats to teach that puppy some manners!

Ellie and I loved the movie We Bought a Zoo.  And dare I admit this?  We’ve now watched it twice… in two days.  Just a note: the movie *is* rated PG for some mild language.  Luckily, the language has gone completely over Ellie’s head.

Anything for a treat.

To see more photos from our shopping experience & movie night, check out my Google+ photo album.

This shop has been compensated as part of a social shopper insights study for Collective Bias.  #CBias All opinions are my own.  #ilovemyK9

When we first brought Ace home, Ellie was incredibly jealous.  Looking back, I now realize that my lap had suddenly became a landing pad for a sweet little snuggly-wuggly puppy.  Now that he’s outgrown the length of my lap & is more interested in finding food and terrorizing Toby, all is right in Ellie’s world again.

Ellie is back to being her sweet little wacky self — full of “good ideas” which most recently included stringing together my chair and nightstand for her Barbies to jump rope.

Each morning is more interesting than the one before.  I wake up early {sometimes painfully early} to take the dogs out.  We walk the promenade across the street from our house and since the puppy snapped our good leash yesterday out of fear of being consumed by the garbage truck, I had to encourage Toby to follow us with the promise of biscuits.  Biscuits rule their minds.  They will do anything for a treat.  Anything.

After this morning jaunt, it is enough to get the puppy warmed up for a little tail chasing.  This is not on Toby’s agenda and now that Ace can jump up on the couch & make flying leaps over the baby gate, there is no safety zone for a middle-aged Maltese.

As I drink my morning coffee, the rodeo begins.  There is chasing, snarling, barking, jumping, pouncing, and much begging for mercy… most of this happens at my feet.

With one cup in me, it is time to feed the clowns.  There is a time-out called at the rodeo and bowls of food are poured.  I act as Toby’s “blind side” protecting his bowl from being tackled by greedy, clumsy paws.  Sometimes Ace gets through my attempts to block the food and kibbles fly through the air like confetti.  Food raining down in the kitchen is euphoric to puppies.

It is like this all day.

Until naptime.

Dogs nap.

When they do, Ellie and I breathe a sigh of relief and rest up for the next rodeo.

The resident preschool fashionista in my house is a dress fanatic — the fancier & more lovely, the better.  My former soft pants and t-shirt girl has blossomed into a Southern, smocked dress loving, full skirt appreciating, preschool darling.

While many small children would not care for online shopping, my daughter had full control of the computer mouse as we browsed the selection on Hartstrings website for a new Easter dress.  {She picks her own clothes out everyday, so I was sure to include her in our shopping experience.}  Their newly improved website is bright and full of amazing photos of their high quality children’s clothing.  We have long been fans of their gorgeous dresses.

Hartstrings has multiple brands represented on their website for different ages & sizes.  Since we were shopping for a size 4T Easter Dress, we went straight to the Hartstrings tab.  There are multiple ways to search and browse, so we began with the Dresses category.

Ellie enjoyed this lovely little pink dress with the flower on the sash.  She quickly added it to the cart {she’s so savvy}, but I wasn’t quite sold yet.  After looking at ALL the dresses, I opted to go back and look at only the New Arrivals.  The fabrics in the Dress to Impress Line immediately caught my eye.

 Our weather has been HOT in the South, so I knew that this Easter would require a dress with breathable fabric.  I instantly fell in love with all of the poplin dresses from the Dress to Impress line.  I especially loved the collar on this little fuchsia bouquet number!  And the trim?  Adorable.

I knew for sure that I also wanted to purchase a dress that could be worn throughout the Spring & Summer and not just for a special occasion.

It became a toss up between the pink & the floral dress — each had the adorable trim &  lightweight cotton.  Plus, they were both ON SALE!  Before checking out, I added a coordinating hair accessory.  I was surprised to see such affordable shipping rates and since I found a coupon code to save an additional 10%, I decided to upgrade my shipping for just $3 more.  Great plan — my package arrived from Pennsylvania in just 2 days.

So what did we pick?

When the package arrived, my preschool fashionista ripped into it and squealed with delight over her new dress!  It fit perfectly.  Now, if we can just get her to wait until Easter to wear it!

This shop has been compensated as part of a social shopper insights study for Collective Bias.  All opinions about our shopping experience & the quality of Hartstrings children’s clothes are my own.  #Cbias #myHartstrings

What’s the most common phrase you hear from older, wiser parents?  

“Enjoy it, it goes by too fast.”

I hear it all the time and I experience it everyday.  I am amazed each morning when I am greeted by a tall girl and not a roly-poly baby.  Old MacDonald had a farm has been replaced by Party Rock. She wants her aunt to bring her a violin.

She has outgrown her dress-up shoes among many things and longs for the day when she can ride in a booster seat.  She is highly aware of the rites of passage that await her.

Ellie likes to talk about time, but she doesn’t understand “value” as in…  ”it takes a lot of weeks to get to CVS.”  She has a calendar on the refrigerator to count down the days until her Nana & Papa come to visit.  Last night she squealed with excitement as she marked off Thursday.

The baby that I used to rock and cuddle still likes to cuddle but now with a stack of books.  She wants you to ask what words begin with “c” or “e” or any letter.  She likes to make patterns with her food, with sugar packets, and always, always asks to go out for lunch.

Someday, she said, she’ll drive a mini-van.  Or a pink truck.

Someday, she said, she’ll be a fashion designer as she added a belt to her newest outfit creation.  She likes to dress the bed posts in my room.  I am often missing shoes and necklaces.

My house is always a mess.  I would rather read books and go to the playground.  This makes Ellie happy.  And that makes me happy.  Though a clean house and all that happiness combined would be like happiness in lights and sparklers.

And on a day when the dogs are up before the birds and Ellie is up before the sun, it’s still a pretty good morning.  My girl is growing up fast.

With just one more day on our calendar before Nana & Papa arrive, she has many things “written” in today’s little square.  Today we will experience joy in the choosing of new library books, in sharing lunch together, and buying new princess panties because every little moment counts.