Dear Friends,
It has been awhile since I have written. I have asked for a weekly column, but I guess someone doesn’t like to share her blog. Someone says that I’m not nearly as clever as I think I am. Someone said that maybe if I stay off the kitchen table, I can have more computer privileges. Someone says my new name should be Dyson or Hoover. I prefer Dirt Devil.
Enough about her – let’s talk about me. Your furry, white & fluffy friend. Notice I said fluffy — I like being fluffy because it makes me feel bigger. It’s like people with 80′s bangs — it makes them feel taller. I love my hair and this book that I came across made me faint:
Please, I beg you with paws outstretched to the heavens…
Do not make me into a cable knit sweater.
This book makes me nervous and sad. It makes me want to puke. It makes me want to run away. No amount of treats could ever make me feel good about a Maltese Fur Coat.
Maybe I should be flattered that this grandma wants to dress like me. I don’t know what grandpa is wearing — chocolate lab? This is a bad idea. Kohl’s is having a sale — go there. Dad said you could. You don’t have time to knit me into anything — not even time for a sock.
What? What did you say?
Get my knickers out of a twist? You don’t want a Furbaby sweater? Phew… thank goodness. I guess it is still 80 degrees here. Okay, forget all that nonsense. If you were just trying to scare Furbaby into being a pack follower, it worked. I will let you be in charge as long as you don’t turn me into a vest.
Oooo…. kids going to the bus stop. Gotta bark! Bye!
Licks & Love,
Furbaby
